"NUMB"

Cold he seemed...silent like a grave..standing infront of the mirror..Ali stared in his own eyes for a while,then lowered his gaze,couldn't confront himself...his life was a story of tribulations,one after another...who can withstand the pain of a friend so dear,laying dead in his arms..he thought...Just when he thought his life was coming together,he realized it was just starting to fall apart..People may have taken him
as an epitome of happiness...infact he was many things but a "happy man" was not one of those things...
anguish piled up fast...

He was a hell of an actor...he had never let the people see that bleeding face behind the mask of those halcyon emotions...but the mirror of his composure was about to shatter..It seemed  that the harder he tried the harder he fell...It's hard to answer the question "what's wrong" when nothings right.

The man he once was...was long gone....what remained of the man was a hollow reflection of himself staring at the mirror...a couple of tear drops broke the barrier of his eyelids and rolled down his cheeks as if they were happy to leave this cursed wretch...he stood still,filled with emptiness,his heart was throbbing as if it also wanted to breakout of his chest....

The cold gale rushed in through the broken window..there was a storm outside...but a far greater blizzard of memories and regrets was blowing inside that man....he could not feel the chilled air...infact he was too numb to feel anything...unable to feel the love,care or hatred of the people around him....he wanted to feel something...

He planned to end his life...took a knife and slashed his radial artery...at first  the blood beaded up in a perfectly crimson dotted line..then the warm blood ran down his pale skin...his mind was at ease now,he didn't stop..he made the cut deeper and deeper..blood pooled around him...a piece of paper was tightly clenched in his fist....while dying in the pool of his own blood his last wish was fulfilled..he wasn't numb anymore..He felt COLD!

ok.enough with the drama...
Such a coward douche!!!!

Ali's point of view before committing suicide ....

The pain that depression brings is one that presses your senses down a passageway so narrow that it makes death look like the only light at the end of the tunnel. It is such an all-consuming and downright fucking ouchies reverie that it physically hurts your person. It is a tangible pain, like an itch, and it leads you to believe that,the end is your only friend. While thoughts of suicide are irrational and inherently counter-intuitive, they are true, and they are real.Seeking one’s own death makes sense to a depressive mind, and is a train of thought very easily rationalised. Its emotional power defies logic, and is able to make suicide, not only like a viable option, but a reasonable one. The only one.

But that doesn’t change a cotton picking thing.

While it is irrational and real and seen as reasonable by the depressed person in question, it is still selfish. I see no use trying to refute this point. Through death, you will cause the people you love, and who love you, a hell of a lot of pain. By releasing yourself of the pain you feel you are inflicting it onto those you care about. Again, this is selfish. There are no ifs or buts about it.

THE AFTERLIFE:

Mr.Ali thought suicide would bring his peace and quite but instead there is even more tension around him now. There are other spirits around him. They are those who have also done the same thing that he did. They belong to the group that is labelled as "Rebels" in the system called "Karma". When others continued to live (perform their Karma) and go on with the battle of life ...Ali and all other spirits around him quit life thinking that was the end of life. Instead now Ali and his "friends" feel that they have jumped from the frying pan into the fire....

The greatest problem after suicide!

Now I am going to tell you the worst thing about a suicide which Mr Ali never thought of. Due to extraordinary anxieties Ali committed suicide. He is a  loser by nature.

But now life has become unbearable again..the everlasting torment... The question is how will Mr Ali solve the new problems. One suggestion is he can try suicide again which though may naturally come to his mind because he has done that before. But the problem is he has already given up his body....

Problems increased with suicide

All those who are prone to suicide must know that the soul is eternal and there is no point committing suicide. Suicide brings about additional problems.Rebirth is not possible because everyone has just a single turn.

AIi wants to smoke because he used to smoke at least 10 cigarettes a day but now he cannot do that.  He has all the feelings and emotions but without the body it is terrible because he cannot vent it out.

He thinks of what his lover is doing at the moment, may be she was meeting her lover but now things are simple beyond him as he cannot stop that. At least if he had the body he would have a great chance of winning her back but now he is helpless. His chances are zero. Who would want to romance with a spirit without a body? :)

Curse...

Because he threw away his body,  he gets into the bad books of God who gave him this precious gift that can never be made with all the wealth in in the universe. Moreover he has defeated the purpose of his parents. Whatever they did to Ali has all gone waste. He is now hated by all others. Suicide is cowardice. The world does not like cowards.  The world loves those who fight until their destined time comes.,,
Of the many quotes that I found on Suicide the following poetical lines caught my attention.

“Razors pain you; 
Rivers are damp; 
Acids stain you; 
And drugs cause cramp. 
Guns aren’t lawful; 
Nooses give way; 
Gas smells awful; 
You might as well live.”

Still if anyone wants to end his "misery"....try this..it would be fun ;)